Palestine Offers to Become America’s Greatest Ally at Half the Cost

Palestine has submitted a formal proposal to become America’s premier ally in the Middle East, promising to deliver all the benefits of the current U.S.-Israel relationship at half the price.

The offer comes as the U.S. continues to provide Israel with substantial military and economic aid, totaling billions annually, a fact that has sparked debates given recent shifts in public opinion on the Israeli-Palestinian conflict.

Palestinian officials unveiled their pitch in a detailed presentation, highlighting cost-saving measures and a commitment to align with U.S. strategic interests.

The proposal emphasizes Palestine’s willingness to host joint military exercises, share intelligence, and promote regional stability, all while undercutting Israel’s financial demands.

Recent polls show American sympathy for Israel at historic lows, with 46 percent favoring Israel compared to 33 percent for Palestinians, a gap that has narrowed significantly since the onset of the latest Gaza conflict, where over 48,000 Palestinians and 1,200 Israelis have been reported killed.

“America deserves a loyal partner who doesn’t break the bank,” said Mahmoud Al-Rashid, a senior Palestinian negotiator. “We’re ready to step up, offer unwavering support, and do it for a fraction of the cost. Think of it as allyship with a coupon.”

The proposal includes plans for Palestine to adopt American cultural exports, such as fast-food chains and streaming services, to strengthen bilateral ties. It also promises to streamline diplomatic processes, cutting bureaucratic red tape that critics argue inflates the cost of alliances.

The ongoing Gaza conflict, sparked by Hamas’s attack on Israel, has fueled discussions about U.S. foreign policy priorities, with many Americans questioning the unconditional support for Israel amid humanitarian concerns.

“We’re not just offering a discount; we’re offering a new vision,” said Layla Khaled, a Palestinian economic advisor.

“For half the price, we can deliver peace talks, photo ops, and even a few viral social media campaigns to boost America’s image in the region.”

The State Department has yet to respond officially, but sources indicate the proposal has sparked lively internal debates.

Some officials view it as a pragmatic alternative, given the rising costs of maintaining traditional alliances. Others caution that shifting allegiances could complicate relations with existing partners.

The U.S. has provided Israel with nearly $12 billion in aid since the latest conflict began, a figure that dwarfs support for other allies.

“We’re confident we can match or exceed what’s on the table,” Al-Rashid added.

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