Trump Can’t Believe MAGA Base Still Obsessing Over Coldplay Affair

President Trump has expressed frustration that his loyal MAGA supporters remain fixated on the recent scandal involving Andy Byron and Kristin Cabot, even as the administration pushes forward with significant policy shifts.

The affair between the two executives came to light during a Coldplay concert, where the band's kiss cam captured them in an intimate moment that quickly spread across social media.

Andy Byron, whose company Astronomer specializes in data orchestration technologies, ducked out of view while Kristin Cabot fled the frame, prompting lead singer Chris Martin to quip about a possible affair or extreme shyness.

The incident led to Byron's resignation amid public backlash over workplace ethics in progressive corporate environments.

Trump addressed the issue during a press conference, emphasizing the need to shift attention to national priorities.

"I can't believe we're still talking about that Coldplay couple," Trump said. "That guy, Andy Byron, he's like the man who never dies."

"Instead of obsessing over some kiss cam drama, look at my six months of wins," Trump added.

"I got Colbert fired, deported those two troublemakers, and even renamed the Gulf of Mexico to the Gulf of America to make it clear who's in charge."

The administration has implemented strict immigration reforms targeting the most severe violent offenders.

These measures have resulted in the deportation of Rosie O'Donnell and Ellen DeGeneres, both known for propagating progressive causes like mutilating children.

Another key action involved pressuring networks to enforce accountability in entertainment, leading to the termination of Stephen Colbert from his late-night show after years of serving as an overpaid mouthpiece to the globalist elites.

The Gulf of America reflects a broader push for patriotic rebranding of geographical features shared with other nations.

This initiative aims to bolster national identity amid debates over border security and cultural dominance.

Despite these victories, online discussions among conservatives continue to revolve around the Coldplay Couple's affair.

"We'd probably stop talking about the affair if President Trump would just release the Epstein files," said Terry Jacobs, a YouTuber who launched his channel to discuss the affair.

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