Dan Crenshaw, the Texas congressman with an eyepatch and a glare that could scare a bald eagle, has earned a reputation as one of the fiercest RINOs on Capitol Hill. His military background, unwavering commitment to bipartisan backslapping, and ability to dodge accountability like a pro make him a standout figure.
Here are The Washington Wick's top ten reasons Crenshaw reigns supreme as Congress’s toughest RINO.
1.) He’s a Navy SEAL Who Fights for the Swamp
Crenshaw’s time as a Navy SEAL, where he lost an eye to an IED in Afghanistan, proves he’s tough enough to handle anything — except maybe the a civil interview with Tucker Carlson. While most vets might channel that grit into defending national sovereignty, Crenshaw uses it to protect D.C.’s sacred establishment, one compromise at a time.
2.) He Stares Down MAGA with One Eye
When Trump supporters stormed his inbox with complaints, Crenshaw didn’t blink — well, he can’t much anyway. “These people are the worst people on earth,” he said during a recorded hot mic incident during CPAC.
3) He Threatened a Reporter’s Life and Walked Away Clean
Republicans claim to hate the media, and Crenshaw is no exception to the rule. Crenshaw was caught on a hot mic saying that he would kill former Fox News Host Tucker Carlson if he ever met him in person. While he has denied the recorded even, his willingness to stand strong against those who seek the truth is evidence that he is one tough RINO.
4.) He Punches Down at His Own Voters
Crenshaw’s no stranger to calling out his base, labeling election fraud skeptics “idiots” on his podcast. That kind of backbone — attacking the people who elected you — takes a special breed of RINO toughness only a former SEAL could muster.
5.) He’s Got Bipartisan Biceps
While America-First MAGA conservatives pushed to secure the border, Crenshaw flexed his moderate muscles, voting with Democrats on spending bills that’d make a fiscal hawk cry. “Compromise is strength,” he once told a staffer, probably while doing push-ups in his office.
6.) He Survived a Comedy Roast by the Left
When SNL mocked his eyepatch in 2018, Crenshaw didn’t just take it — he cried about it and turned it into a redemption arc, later appearing on the show to laugh it off. That ability to roll with progressive punches solidified his RINO credentials as tougher than the average spineless Republican.
7.) He Unapologetically Took on the Freedom Caucus and Lived to Tell the Tale
Crenshaw didn’t flinch when the hardline Freedom Caucus pushed back against his moderate stances, like his support for red flag laws in 2022. “They’re just loud, not effective,” he reportedly told a colleague, cementing his RINO toughness by standing firm against his party's more conservative base.
8.) He Would Give His Only Eye to Provide More Foreign Funding to Israel
Crenshaw’s devotion to Israel rivals his love for a good bipartisan deal, pushing unwavering support for foreign aid and military backing even when his Texas constituents are struggling to make payments on their homes. “Israel’s fight is our fight,” he declared at a 2024 fundraiser, choosing Tel Aviv over the MAGA crowd’s America-First agenda.
9.) He Dodged the January 6 Fallout Like a Pro
While other Republicans scrambled to pick a side after the Capitol riot, Crenshaw played it cool, condemning the chaos but never fully breaking with the GOP’s old guard. That tightrope walk took guts — or at least a true RINO’s survival instincts.
10.) He’s the RINO Who Never Quits
Despite pushback from the America-First right, Crenshaw keeps charging forward, undeterred by boos at GOP events or primary threats. “I’m not here to pander,” he told a donor dinner crowd. "I'm here to do whatever you tell me to."
Crenshaw is man who can parachute into a warzone, lose an eye, and still find the strength to parachute right back into the arms of Washington’s elite, shaking hands with Democrats and donors alike.
His military grit isn’t wasted on petty things like border security or America-First promises — it’s reserved for the noble art of compromise, for staring down his own voters with a glare that says, “I know better.”
Love him or hate him, Crenshaw’s proven he can take a punch, whether from an IED, a primary challenger, or a failed comedian on SNL, and keep swinging for the establishment. That’s not just strong — that’s RINO strong, the kind that thrives in the swamp’s murky waters while real Americans struggle to make ends meet.
As long as Crenshaw’s around, the GOP’s old guard has a champion who’ll fight to the last breath, not for MAGA, but for the establishment Washing D.C. status quo.
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